Wednesday, January 31, 2007

The braggart complains

After reading Dan’s blog today, I decided that I also wanted to share some of my high school grades:*

Mainly because I was a genius.

I’ve never been an overachiever though. And I’m far from a perfectionist. Anyway who has ever worked with me on anything as probably heard me utter the words, “Whatever. I give up. It’s good enough.” Throughout high school I relied on a solid method of procrastinating until the last possible minute, starting assignments with enthusiasm only to say, ‘Whatever, it’s good enough,” when I was nowhere close to really being finished, and then relying on my expert bullshitting skills to ace all my classes. (This is why you’ll note that my math marks are barely passing, and my math 30 is conspicuously absent—I never took grade 12 math because it’s difficult to bullshit your way through algerbraic equations in the advanced math class, especially when you’re slightly dyslexic with numbers.** But you’ll have note the exceptionally high English grade—the highest mark in the 2002 graduation class. English is what bullshitting was invented for.) And when my bullshit skills failed me, my charm and winning smile always got me what I wanted. And when even that didn't quite work, I was always good at crying.

My mom always told me that I should seriously pursue a career as a spin doctor. Due to personal ethics, I refuse to lie about anything, but I have definitely perfected the art of the white lie, or just flat out working around the truth. After watching Thank You For Smoking last night, I sat back with a smug grin on my face and the thought, “I could do that.” (Well, except for the part where Nick was a tobacco lobbyist, because I wouldn’t be down with that.) And anyone whose ever had a debate with me can attest to that—my favourite role to play is the devil’s advocate, and I have a hard time forming opinions because I like to play to all sides of the stories. Pick the right one, and you’ve got yourself a golden white lie. Because there isn’t two sides to a story; there is a whole grey area surrounding it, and that grey area is my favourite place to be.

Bullshit is also not getting me through journalism school. Yesterday I was at school for 8 hours without a break, and today I was at school for 11 hours, with only a 45 minute break to grab some sustenance. My eyes were bloodshot by the time I got home. I’m working harder in school this year than I ever have before.

It’s all because now that I’ve decided that I don’t care about journalism anymore, I have to try to get As in my classes so that I can get into graduate school, whereas before my marks didn’t matter at all.

The irony of this isn’t lost on me.

In other news, my weekends and Saturday nights have turned into baking and cooking extravanganzas. On Saturday I made cookies.

And a white chocolate rhubarb coffee cake that isn't much to look at, but was delicious. It dissapeared in less than 24 hours.

*I could only share some for security purposes. The Alberta education system uses grades as "passwords" which is also why I blacked out some of the numbers. Also, to explain to all the non-Albertans out there, 10 is grade 10 level, 20 is grade 11, and 30 is grade 12. At the end of our grade 12 terms, we are required to take Provincial Diploma Exams. The PDEs are a province-wide standard of testing, and worth 50% of our final grade, so I guess it's comparable to taking SATs. Also, check out all the little "Hs" for honours.

**I was only allowed to graduate because I completed my French 30, which, for some reason, is a substitute for math. I also graduated with 120 credits. I only needed 100.


  1. I can't believe that NO ONE has contested the "I was a genius" statement on this post. Hmmm. Either it turns out you'll either all agree with everything I'll say because you know how smart I am.

    Or else no one is reading this.

  2. I read it. Do you really not care about journalism anymore and what do you want to do now?

  3. It's not that I totally don't care about it...but a bunch of stuff (that I can't discuss online) happened that made me realize I'm really not cut out for it.
    This, in combination with being in Vanuatu all summer, has made me realize that I need to be working in a job where I'm actually working with people. It's the only thing I really like. After all, why do I keep working as a resume advisor when they pay me in a pennies and don't give me raises, ever?

  4. Oh. But I want to go to grad school for International Development, yo!

  5. I wouldn't contest your self-proclaimed genius, but I might on you saying you're not an overacheiver in the same post you share that you had 20 extras credits at the end of high school. Who does that much extra work in high school? I didn't do Gr.12 Math either, but that was because I didn't have to, and I'm really not an overachiever.

  6. i don't understand this numbered grading system at all. what happened to good ol' A thru F?

    are you still a genius or was that only back in high school?

  7. The numbers are percentages out of 100. And while my GPA isn't even close to the highest it could possibly be, I'm in the top 15% of my class, although I have no clue how or why because I'm kind of a slacker.

    (I was going to include a picture of my current GPA, but the school is witholding my marks because I'm too poor to pay my tutition.)

  8. "English is what bullshitting was invented for" Afuckingmen&hallelujah.