Wednesday, October 18, 2006

Problems in China: The Series

1) I just walked downstairs to witness Katrina doing the dishes in her underwear. Now, anyone who's been in China knows that this isn't unusual behaviour, or a problem by any means. In fact, it's par for the course, and although Kash is the reigning queen of being consistantly pantless, Sasha and I have joined the ranks.

No, the thing that threw me off was that Katrina was wearing a pair of men's underwear over tights. A little odd, even for her. "I like the underwear,"I told her.
"Thanks," she said turning around, to reveal a huge bulge in the front portion of the underwear. "Do you like my penis too?"

2) We have cockroaches.

3) Katrina has been waking up with mysterious huge red welts all over her body. The source is unclear. Bug bites? Aliens probing her in her sleep? It's a mystery, really.

4) Karen is sick, I have a ridiculous cold (I have been home sick for the past two days), Katrina has been coughing for a month straight, and Sasha is getting over a case of strep throat.

5) Three/Five residents of the house are strangely and contently smitten. This is not a problem- just another oddity worth noting.

6) Brie is gone, and Sasha is leaving in two months.


  1. G'night Katrina! Sleep tight! Don't let the bed bugs bite......Seriously, the little buggers will eat you alive if you're not careful!

  2. There actually is a problem with bedbugs in Toronto. I think it might be the problem, which creeps the hell out of me.
    She washed all her sheets.
    Here's the weird thing though: her boyfriend slept in her bed, and while Kash woke up covered in bites, he remained untouched.

  3. Which reminds me of a cardinal rule of mine -- "There's a reason someone is throwing that out!"

    This rule is envoked in much the same way as "Get up off that thing!" is played.

    An otherwise intelligent person cruises through a random neighborhood and spots a [mattress\pair of shorts\rug] in the trash that they think will look lovely in their [bedroom\short drawer\living room].

    "My oh my -- that mattress is exactly what I need! Give me a hand getting it into the truck"

    "Dude! There's a reason someone is throwing that out!"

    Don't get me wrong, I am never to proud to go ghetto shopping, and I've had some incredible luck dumpster diving in the days of yore, but when you see a discarded [mattress\pair of shorts\rug] there's usually a very good reason that someone has chosen to discard them.

    If the suspected bed bug problem escelates to the point of discarding the mattress, you've got a photo-blog just waiting to be written. . .

  4. Ugh. I did research today and apparently they go through heating ducts...and guess whose room is directly above Katrina's!?

    Also, the Game is "Get Off That Thing!". Although is I suppose if James Brown was playing it, it definitely would be "Get Up Off That Thing!" Hell, if James Brown was playing, I'm sure we'd *have* to change the name.