Monday, May 15, 2006

I'm Not Dead. Yet.

Jess' 22nd Birthday- Because I'm Not Dead (Yet)

Thursday, May 25th, 2006

"751" @ 751 Queen St. W. 11:00 p.m.

Pre-drinks @ China at 9:00 p.m.

If you are reading this, you are invited!* Feel free to bring friends, since I don't think I have enough yet. (I'm still collecting.) I will wear my red dress. It will be wonderful.

*Unless of course, you are some creepy old man with the intentions of stealing my kidneys. In which case, you are only invited if you buy me a shot.

Also, the lovely flyer was designed by Brie.


  1. thanks for the invite, i would come but im about 3000km away. hope you have a good night. and have some banana jagers on me. the cheque is in the mail.

    tell brie nice work on the flyer. and all general brieness.

  2. lol. Yes, nice work on the general Brieness. She is good at being Brie, isn't she?

    I hate bananas. But not enough to put on the "hate" list.

  3. i have heard of this bananaphobia. my roommate can't stand even the site of them, let alone the smell. i think its a new phobia swiffering the nation. sad really cuz bananas rule. even banana boat suntan lotion.

  4. I'd happily buy you a shot, but unfortunately I might as well be on Mars, so happy birthday, babe.

  5. I will be there! Who would have thought last year when we were sitting at the Harbour House celebrating your birthday, that we would both be in Ontario this year to celebrate it. Well, I guess we both kind of knew you would be. I on the other hand.... I kind of wish we were driving to Edmonton for the sole purpose of buying you a cowboy hat though ;) I can however make you another butterfly cake, that could bring back memories.

    Also, my dad refuses to eat bananas in the summer because he attracts mosquitos when he eats them...Its kind of silly, because he really likes bananas.

  6. My Birthday last year: sitting at the Harbour House, by myself, writing a bursary application, until the flaggers bought me a birthday scotch. Haha. I had kind of forgotten about that.

  7. thus this mean your going to have a "I'm about to die" party

  8. How much for your liver and eyes? I've got a buyer lined up already. Two shots and a pitcher of beer?

  9. Anonymous12:11 AM

    You are turning 22? ... So old, but I guess that makes sense. Good pics from the road trip. Since others are buying you shots for your bday, I will buy you the "biznatch" tattoo you have always wanted.


  10. Anonymous1:13 AM

    aw jess your birthday last year was fun! the butterfly cake was the best...i know monique wants to make one to relive the memories....but i wont be there to put on the finishing touches! so no chance it will be as good as last year! but you know what will be awesome....if we meet up in australia!!! i have your email...i'm leaving monday!
    love kate

  11. I am a little worried about making your cake. I asked people at school for ideas on something I could make that would make it in one piece to Toronto. Sadlly, I think I may have to bake it here and decorate it when I get there. Or in the morning when you are growling and hungover and I am up early and annoyingly chipper as usual. The girls can help me too. Since Kate is screwing off To Australia this year ;)
    Also, I am a little nervous as to what kind to make. I didn't even know you didn't like bananas?!
    ps, I have been blogging an extreme amount this week since I only have 2 weeks left of a computer. Mabye I will have to buy a new one. No internet would suck.

  12. Birthdays are fun. Funner than this International Political Economy class that I'm sitting in right now. Wireless Internet is ruining my life. I fear I will turn into a robot soon. I HATE robots. Oh, boy! I found something that I hate.

    I hope somebody gives you sex for your birthday (the red dress should help), because everyone should have sex on their birthday, even though I've never had sex on my birthday. I will start having sex on my birthday next year, when I turn 22. This will be my new years resolution (except the kind of resolution that can only happen once a year).

  13. I had sex on my birthday once. ONCE. (When I turned 17, no less! And it was the shameful kind of sex, in the back of a car. It was not enjoyable.) Now that you point this out, I'm appalled. Why have I not had sex on my birthday more often?

    As for last year, the butterfly cake was the best part. Last year on my birthday, my mom was late for my birthday lunch, my dad didn't show up, I ate dinner alone, and then I wrote a bursary application. Alone. Yay for birthdays. (Blargh.)

    Best birthday to date was the year I turned 20, and my parents were out of town, and Chloe came down for the weekend and everyone ended up crashing at my house. We conquered the Pierceland wedding that weekend, and I made Kraft Dinner in high heels. Also notable: Danny and Tyler curling up in bed together. Awww. There was no sex that night, but I semi-spooned with Chloe. So it's all good.

  14. For some strange reason being as I have been pretty single for the last 2 years. I have always been dating someone on my birthday. Well from the time that I was 15 that is. So I guess it happens to be my lucky love life day of sorts.

    I have had some noteable bad ones too, my boyfriend of 4 years moving away, and someone, not mentioning any names....calling me a beast for getting her to give someone her phone number.... We all know how that turned out. I love that story. I think you should blog about it someday.

    Mabye my b-day is lucky for you as well Jess. You spooned on my last b-day in Calgary and this time it was not with me. Lucky you( depending on how you want to reflect upon the situation), poor person who got stuck sleeping next to my drunkeness.
    Anyways, I hope this year you are a little luckier. Haha 17 and in the back of a truck, do you think that is a Cold Lake thing.....

    As for last year, I was there, just kind of working at the time. The early butterfly cake suprise was sadly the best I could do.

  15. Happy Early Birthday! I hope a Dr Phil look-a-like who moonlights as as stand-up comedian buys you a cold celery sandwich for a stack of pennies while using a paddle boat to escort you to a snorkeling location that he read about on MySpace to dive with a school of tuna fish! [insert emoticon here]

  16. Also, Rev, do you recall the cowboy hat argument that broke loose when I posted my birthday wishlist last year?

    Oh, dear!

    I appreciate that you've been reading my blog for that long, though.
    Also, on a note related to your blog: i was hoping to see more pictures of your new home. I enjoyed the ones from Joshua Tree.

  17. Anonymous12:27 AM

    3 things of note (or to ignore, your choice):

    1) Brie's choice of red hue is terrible on that background. It's very hard to read. Next time I'd either use a more saturated red, or outline the text with a 1-pixel stroke of either black or white.

    2) Do you really think it's wise to post flyers that feature your address on the internet? I know that we all like to laugh at those articles about "no such thing as anonymity on the internet" etc. and pretend we're invincible. But there's a lot of truth to them.
    I don't mean to criticize or nag, but I'm the big brother, so I figure I'm allowed to do this since it's officially my job to look out for my little sister. Then again, if that's not your address, as it is pretty hard to read, just ignore this.

    3) My birthday gift is a promise, and it is this - I promise that I will very probably forget to call you on your birthday. :-)

    (and as I'm about to click send I'm thinking to myself "I'm sure I'm going to get harassed for this later.")

  18. Andrew,

    I don't live on Queen St. 751 is the name of the bar we are going to. So, yes, no worries big brother. I am not posting my address on the Internet.

    As for Brie, she's not just some random bitch who knows how to use Photoshop. It's actually part of her coursework for her Communications & Design degree. (I admit it's difficult to read here, but that's partially due to the size constraints, etc.)

    The End.

  19. Anonymous2:26 PM

    *Gasp* I'm shocked! In no way did I suggested Brie is a random photoshop bitch! How dare you! I simply offered a (totally uncalled-for, mind you) critique of her work. :-)

  20. Happy be-early birthday! Have a ball! Or two~ ^-*

  21. Anonymous7:55 PM

    i am really hoping to be there... first i thought i would be for sure, then it looked like i had to go to niagara falls, and now it seems like that is going to be on another day.. maybe.
    so, if things keep being complicated and I don't end up making it, then HAPPY BIRTHDAY and I will probably send you some email version of me saying that on the day (not an e-card though, but some strangely semi-personal emily-esque greeting).
    also, why did i think you were older than me? and why does that keep happening to me and then making me feel old...?